Sperm bandit

Speaking of spooge-filled PreggoTwinkies, Avatar...I came...uh, across this while searching for...you know.

Horror of horrors, it's a song!

Sperm Bandit was influenced by Dotun Adebayo’s book and documentary “Sperm Bandit” about the modern day phenomena of some women acquiring the sperm of a male partner unbeknown [sic] to the man for the purpose of pregnancy with no intention of any further requirements of the man…

I mean, I support father's rights as much as the next unknocked-up person, but do we have to sing about it...? And there's a dickumentary cockumentary documentary? I need to see this, but I'm afraid it might take place within the punanny of a spooge-filled sperm burglar.

Slap a glove on that puppy (and flush) or better yet, get a vasectomy, guys. And where the hell is that male birth-control pill?!

I'm horrible

I confess: every time I see a pregnant woman or a woman with kids, I think briefly about how much sticky, slimy, warm spooge she had to have just chillin' inside her vag for lengthy periods of time in order for it to happen.

DEATH BY SPOOGE

Help! Spooge has done a hostile takeover on my blogroll...!

You never can trust that junk.

That spoogy-clean feeling..

A particularly gross occurrence at my work lately - soft soap dispensers in the bathroom that usually give out a pink soapy stuff have been modified. Now they are stainless steel protrusions that ejaculate a stream of white goop into your hands.

Am I being oversensitive in not wanting to wash my hands with sperm? I think I might have to take my chances with the junkie infested public toilets nearby.